morrowlife

Here are Shannon, Andy, and Mark at Andy’s first college dorm. I believe we were dropping Andy off at school for the first time. Great Art courtesy of my old Olympus digital camera and part of my exclusive Shannon series.

That was an interesting trip. We did a little sightseeing before we went to school to drop Andy off. As soon as we got him settled in his room, though, he pretty much said goodbye and was done with us. So we left. I understand completely. I was really excited to get to school way back when and wanted to start meeting people and exploring.

Pretty good day today. I went live with the new PhotoDoc site this afternoon. I still don’t have the conference registration feature working, but I kind of have a placeholder and I think I can get it set up tomorrow. There’s also a bunch of beautification that has to be done, but it doesn’t keep the new site from being functional. And the old site was so bad that this is already a big improvement, I think. My Loyal Readers are welcome to have a look and tell me what they think.

I’m a little worried about telling my Loyal Readers about another thing that’s been going on, but I think it’ll be okay. As desperately as I miss Shannon and as deeply in love with her as I was, still am, and will always be, I’m already feeling lonely. I’ve been tending that loneliness by attending meetup.com groups. I’ve really enjoyed the sushi group. I like the format of a small group at dinner together. There’s great conversation, great food, and lots of fun. The 40+ Singles group has some nice people, but their events tend to be large groups in noisy places, which just isn’t my style. I attended another of their events this afternoon and just didn’t enjoy it much.

The problem is that the group meetings don’t really satisfy my desire for one-on-one time with the fair sex. I love having somebody just to talk to and do things with. Mark’s fine as far as he goes, but it’s just not the same. So I decided to see if I could generate some interest by signing up on a couple of free dating apps. Huge step. I sent out several feelers to some women in my general age group who seemed normal, nice, and attractive, hoping to get maybe one or two positive responses. I’ve gotten a few so far. I’ve met a couple and discovered that there are normal, attractive, happy, well-adjusted ladies who might find me attractive too. I’m delighted and enjoying myself immensely.

Are you shocked, Loyal Readers? Is it too soon? It feels right to me and I don’t think it’s disrespectful or degrading to the love Shannon and I shared or to her memory. She asked me to move forward happily and without guilt. So that’s what I’m doing. Let me know if I’m out of line.

And I’ll leave my Loyal Readers with this shocking food violence news: apple fritter stabbing!

See you tomorrow.

Here are Shannon and Mark in front of a warming hut somewhere out in the woods in the Sierra Nevada. It was closed that day. I don’t think anybody needed warming up in August. Great Art courtesy of my old Olympus camera and part of my famous Shannon, Architecture, Camping, Hiking, and Vacation series.

It’s not too often that I find a picture that fits into five different famous series. Also, I’m pretty sure that picture was used before. But I don’t care. I like it, and I’m still working on my informal Arm Around Mom series. My Loyal Readers are invited to enjoy it.

Pretty good day today. I didn’t really get any work done. I got busy talking to folks on the phone and via email, and in the afternoon I helped Mark put together his new computer. It’s fully operational now and I’m not sure if I’ll ever see him again. My one significant bit of work was going to lunch with a lady I recently met who is a longtime software marketer. She gave me all sorts of good ideas and advice. Plus, the lunch was pretty good. So there’s that.

And there’s really nothing else to discuss tonight, so I’ll leave my Loyal Readers with this shocking food violence news: peanut butter assault!

See you tomorrow.

Here are Shannon and Andy at Ellis Island in March 2012. We went and saw the Statue of Liberty that day also. I think the visit to Ellis Island was by far the more interesting of the two. Great Art courtesy of the exclusive iPhone-cam, taken on Ellis Island, and part of my famous Shannon and Architecture series.

As usual, I’ve waited until way too late to start writing today’s post. So I guess it’ll be Extreme Short Shrift again.

Had a good weekend. Ken and I worked on the pickup on Saturday morning. And this time, we actually worked on it! We took brackets off the engine, cleaned them up, and painted them. Next time we get together, I suspect we’ll put them back on the engine. Progress!

Sunday, we went to Ken and Melanie’s daughter’s husband’s parents’ house for Easter dinner. We had a very nice time. I had met them once before and they were very welcoming. There were probably about 20-25 people there and we had a great time. I even played a little bocce ball.

We had been asked to bring a dessert and I was puzzling about what to do. As it turns out, I went to a sushi group dinner on Friday night and the guy sitting next to me was a pastry chef. He suggested a buy some of those fancy cupcakes. On Saturday, Ken and I ran over to the fancy cupcake store and I bought a dozen. They were popular and delicious. They were probably popular because they were delicious, come to think of it. So I guess I did well that time.

Got some really good work done today on the new website. I finally found an e-commerce plugin for WordPress that will actually work. Now I have to get the backend link to PayPal working. I think that’ll happen tomorrow.

And that’s about it for today. I’ll leave my Loyal Readers with this shocking food violence news: sandwich-caused flight delay!

See you tomorrow.

Here are Shannon and Andy at The Inn On the Park in New York City’s Central Park. As you can see, it was a bit of a chilly day and they were huddling together to stay warm. Great Art courtesy of the exclusive iPhone-cam and part of my famous Shannon, Architecture, and Garden series.

Extremely Short Shrift tonight. It’s very, very late.

Mark ordered the parts for his new computer today. He’s really excited to get everything and put it together. I’m excited for him.

I tried to go to another 40+ Singles happy hour event this afternoon, but I had been feeling kind of sick for a couple hours. I went as far as driving nearly all the way over there when I decided it was a bad idea. So I came home. I’m not really sorry – there were going to be a whole lot of people there for this one and I enjoy the really crowded events much less than small ones. I’m still planning to go to the sushi event tomorrow night, of course.

Got some good work done, but not enough. There’s always tomorrow.

And I need to go to bed. I’ll leave my Loyal Readers with this exciting Morrowlife Employment Agency job opportunity: France-invading giant multi-colored slug!

See you tomorrow.

Here are Shannon and Mark at the Maswik Lodge during our Grand Canyon-based McCulloch family reunion. This is the first of what I’m calling the Arm Around Mom series. She loved our kids more than anything and they loved her back. Still do, in fact. I’m so glad she had the chance to appreciate each of them as adults. She wanted to be a part of so much more of their lives, of course. It was her greatest regret. But what she got was so good. Great Art courtesy of the exclusive iPhone-cam, taken at the Grand Canyon National Park, and part of my famous Shannon and Vacation series.

We didn’t exactly stay at the Maswik Lodge. It’s inside the Grand Canyon National Park and very lovely. We stayed in nearby Williams and rode the scenic train in to the park. Williams was fun, our hotel was very nice, and the train ride was enjoyable. It would have been even cooler if they hadn’t already retired the good old steam locomotive in favor of a boring – but vintage – diesel-electric model. But it was still cool.

Today was an interesting day. Two things happened that really matter: an epiphany and a relief.

First, the relief. When I sat down to check my email this morning, I discovered a message from our life insurance company. I had spoken with the claims person yesterday on an insurance-related matter and happened to ask her how my claim was coming along. She told me she had just received a partial collection of medical documentation that morning and would start looking at it soon, even though there was still more to come. Well, the note this morning said she had seen enough to determine our claim was legitimate, so the check is being mailed tomorrow morning. Not that I expected anything different, of course, since our claim was entirely legitimate. Shannon wasn’t sick when the insurance went into effect on February 1, 2013. However, she became sick so soon thereafter that it made sense for the insurance company to ask for proof that we didn’t know something was up when we bought the policy. So I don’t blame them for checking. Still, I was kind of dreading it turning into a fight and I’m relieved it didn’t. I did a bit of calculating this morning, and the life insurance proceeds will replace all but about $2500 of the money we spent on Shannon’s medical care and post-death expenses.

I’m sure my Loyal Readers know I would have gladly given the life insurance proceeds along with all my money, all my belongings, and my own life to have saved Shannon. I would have done anything. But that was not to be, so it’s at least a small ray of sunlight to be made mostly financially whole from the experience.

Now the epiphany. I have reflected many times on the fact that my last year with Shannon was the sweetest one of my life. That thought has comforted me greatly, but I have also been puzzled by it and perhaps even felt a little bit guilty that amidst all her horrible suffering I felt that I had the happiest year of my marriage. I know she was happy too, but why was it the best year of my life? I think I figured that one out today, and the answer was so obvious that a more thoughtful person would have understood it long ago: it was my greatest (and possibly only) prolonged opportunity to serve her and I feel that I did it unreservedly and to the best of my ability. I resolved very early on during her illness to face our mutual hardship with good cheer and optimism and to give her whatever she needed immediately and cheerfully. I decided that delayed service is a sign of reluctant service, so when she asked for anything, she got it immediately, no matter what. I learned long ago that service given grudgingly is no service at all, but I don’t think I’ve typically been a good exemplar of that teaching. This past year, I did everything in my power to turn that around.

So I think I’ve learned that the sweetness was at least partially found in seeing to Shannon’s needs and trying my best to make her comfortable and happy. Of course, it was also wonderful to spend essentially all our time together, to say all the words of love and devotion that could be said, and to treasure each other. In spite of the sorrow and pain, it was a magical year.

Maybe that’s why Shannon was so happy all her life. She served and served and gave and gave. What a great life she gave me. I hope she was amply rewarded for it.

Got some more work done on the website today. It’s looking better all the time. I need to work out a reservation system for our upcoming seminar right away. It will take a little bit of research to find out what software is out there that will fit our needs. I also need to personalize the overall website design just a bit – it looks way too generic. Embarrassingly so, I think. So my design hat (probably a Tyrolean cap with a feather) goes on tomorrow morning. The backlog gets whittled down just a little bit every day.

Mark and I went to In-N-Out for dinner tonight. Enjoyed it. Probably should have cooked something at home, but I got busy with the website and didn’t want to stop to cook today. Lame.

And I’ll leave my Loyal Readers with this shocking food violence news: freeway-blocking hams!

See you tomorrow.