Shannon – March 2002
Here’s the oldest digital photo I could find of my darling wife Shannon. It was taken March 29, 2002. Isn’t she beautiful? This picture was taken in the breakfast nook of our house in Stafford, Virginia. Our first brand-new house. We loved that place. I don’t know, but I believe that left arm may be me. And there’s our cute little dog Belle in the background.
I’m working on picking out a few pictures of Shannon over the years to feature here on the Morrowlife blog. Andy, Mark and I reviewed a bunch of them this evening and there are some real treasures. I’m excited about this project.
It was a pleasant day together with all the kids. We didn’t really do much other than be together. We had some nice meals – especially the chicken mole enchiladas Katy made this evening – and really enjoyed each other’s company all day. There are things we need to get done soon – things that need to be sorted, gifts that need to be given to the kids, and bills that need to be paid. So we may want to get busy tomorrow with those things.
It’s been three days now since Shannon’s passing and I don’t think the reality has set in yet. I think I’m most keenly aware of the fact that I can’t talk with her, I can’t call her, I can’t text her. I can never do those things again. There are things I want to tell her and I can’t. I never will. We’ve been apart for a month or two at a time, but we could always talk with each other nearly every day. So I feel alone right now. I suspect that will get worse for quite a while before it begins to heal. I don’t suppose it will ever be okay.
The kids have been great. I can’t believe how well they’re all taking their own loss. We’re limping along together, but we’re making it. We had a genuinely nice evening tonight.
I’ve spoken during the past couple of days with just about everyone in my family. I’m so grateful for my parents and my brothers and sisters. I love them dearly. I also spoke with Shannon’s dad today. My appreciation for him has grown greatly over the past year. He cared for Shannon’s mother tirelessly during her extremely long, debilitating illness. He never wavered. Then when she finally died, he grieved, but he continued living and continued being happy. I want to be like him.
I’m feeling scattered, so I’ll end tonight. Lots of feelings I’m not used to, but I’ll ride ’em out and be fine.
See you tomorrow.